New Years Blog

 Just click here.

I'm sorry it's so long.

Sorry.

SORRY!

Time's Up

You gave me 2 days to think about it. But those 2 days have turned into 4 months. And I've done nothing but think about it. Believe me, I've thought long and hard. And I've come to a conclusion. For sure, I have my answer now. I know what I want. And what I don't want. I've got it. Sooo, you can come out now. I got it. I'm done. Hello? It's over. Feel free to say something. Or show up. Anytime. Anytime at all. Alright. Jokes over. Time to come back.

Please?

Colorsplash

Inspiration

I Hate Change

I was never good with change. And college isn't helping.

Epiphany

I think I'm over this forever alone phase. Yay! I like getting over it. No matter how many times I go in, getting over it is the best part every time. I've told myself "Karla didn't meet Eric until she was 20" but it didn't really help. Until now. I get it! I just haven't met the man I'm meant to be with yet! That's it! Obviously. Let's look at my options. As close as I got with Jonathan, we need to just get him out of the picture. And then what am I left with? Nothing! Seriously, these guys have been my life for forever. But college has changed us. College has changed them! And not for the better. I don't want them. I need to stop acting like they're my only options because they're not! I'm not stuck with them! Not romantically anyway. I don't have to stay to babysit them anymore and sympathize and be their rebound and make sure it's all okay. Obviously I want them to be happy. But it's not high school! And I don't have to take all the pain anymore. I can actually put all the pain in the past. That being said, that just leaves a brighter future! I just haven't met this guy yet! Wow. I'm in a great mood :)

Thank you Jason Guerrero!!

PS: You better treat her right. You better love her to no end and make sure she knows she's loved. Because I did not let you use me and then dump me for her just so you could cheat on her. Hell no. I don't care that I've never formally met her and I've known you 4 years, college does NOT mean you can be an ass.

10 cents for the Bullet

Nosey

0: Height - 4'9 1/2
1: Virgin? - Duh
2: Shoe Size - 6 or 6 1/2
3: Do you Smoke? - Never
4: Do you Drink? - Never
5: Do you take drugs? - No sir
6: Age you get mistaken for - Anything between 12 and 18
7: Have Tattoos? - No
8: Want any tattoos? - Gross
9: Got any Piercings? - 2 on each ear
10: Want any Piercings? - No more, anything but the ear is unattractive
11: Best friend? - I wanna say Jonathan
12: Relationship status - Single
13: Biggest turn on - Singer!
14: Biggest turn off - Drugs
15: Favorite Movie - Howl's Moving Castle
16: I’ll love you if - You sing/play me "Your Guardian Angel" or give me a blue rose
17: Someone you miss - JuanJosé Medina
18: Most traumatic experience - Dunno
19: A fact about your personality - Obsessive
20: What I hate most about myself - A lot
21: What I love most about myself - Open-minded
22: What I want to be when I get older - Actor
23: My relationship with my sibling(s) - Very good
24: My relationship with my parent(s) - LOL no
25: My idea of a perfect date - Disney World! (you said perfect)
26: My biggest pet peeves - Bad grammar
27: A description of the girl/boy I like - Impossible
28: A description of the person I dislike the most - I don't think that's a thing -_^
29: A reason I’ve lied to a friend - I'm a wimp
30: What I hate the most about work/school - Working?
31: What y last text message says - "I can wrap it here and we can give it to her tomorrow"
32: What words upset me the most - useless question
33: What words make me feel the best about myself - another useless question
34: What I find attractive in women - i dunno, i just know when a girl is pretty
35: What I find attractive in men - dark hair, light eyes, nice smile, charming personality, musical/theatrical/artistic ability, humor, and above all a strong love of God
36: Where I would like to live - here is good
37: One of my insecurities - my face
38: My childhood career choice - singer
39: My favorite ice cream flavor - chocolate chip cookie dough
40: Who wish I could be - Ariana Grande, for funsies
41: Where I want to be right now - here is fine
42: The last thing I ate - Panes!
43: Sexiest person that comes to my mind immediately - Jared Leto
44: A random fact about anything - This was unrevealing and unamusing.

To Do Lists

The Things We Remember

It's hard to ever forget certain conversations. Especially the ones that last until 6AM.

Who am I kidding, I'm in love with you.

Don't Read! Religion. Ew.

That was so moving. I seriously felt the need to sob in that church. How is it that God always knows exactly what to say? I don't even know if I can put my thoughts and feelings into words, but I feel that I have to. I have been so awful this year. Seriously, I have distanced myself from God so immensely, it pains me. I am fully aware of how horrible I've been, and I've been stalling on asking for forgiveness. I've been scared. I've been doubtful. I've been ignorant. I've been neglectful. I've been absolutely awful! But He loves me. Oh man, does He love me. And He has done the ultimate to prove it. I don't think I've ever really grasped it until now, but OH MY GOODNESS. He truly does love me! He has given so much, He has given EVERYTHING for me. No matter how undeserving I am, and how ungrateful I can be. He loves me. I need to stop. I need to stop and rethink this year. My life. I can't keep doing this. I need to find Him again. Find Him and, for once in my life, show Him just a portion of the love that He so deserves. Show Him that bit of faith that I need for Heaven. Because He is so good. And I need to strive to be more like him. This holiday is called Christmas for a reason. Remember, this is a celebration. He is here. He has come. Our Savior, loving and forgiving, has come. I can't even fathom it. There's so much I want to say. And so much I want my peers and loved ones to know. I hope someone finds this. I truly do. I want them to hold me to this. To constantly bring me back to this post and remind me of it. Remind me that I promise to be better. That I said "I want to walk in the right path, with Christ as my guide and the scriptures as my map". Merry Christmas

Statuses

"Little does my friend know that I've spent 4 months making her the best present ever."
You dunno how badly I want that to be about me.

Lovely Family You Got There

WOW youz a b*tch!

Thanks for saying hi by the way. You know, when I was standing right next to you.

Your little sister is quite the charmer. Angry little thing, isn't she?

Oh and the middle child? Yeah she's just like you. Just. Like. You.

-_____________-

Dunno what your beef is, but you may go.

Dear Target & FYE

I appreciate that your entire store is filled with things I want. HOWEVER, I don't appreciate that you don't have any of the gifts I want to buy for other people, especially since I'm never going ot get any of the things I want for myself anyway! Fix that. Kthnxbye.

Love,

Sammy

PS: FYE, I'm all about that cashier. Cute/helpful/enthusiastic? That's the kind of employee people like to see. Me included :)

facepalm

Oh Venezuela

Oh well. Philippines > USA, just saying.

Top 16

1.       Venezuela

2.       Turkey

3.       France

4.       Peru

5.       Russia

6.       Mexico

7.       Poland

8.       Hungary

9.       South Africa

10.   Philippines

11.   Croatia

12.   Brazil

13.   Kosovo

14.   Australia

15.   India

16.   USA

(some obvious. I think I'm cheering for Venezuela)

Pageants

I hate pageants.

I abhor pageants.

I've never enjoyed a pageant ever!

But here I am, watching Miss Universe, actually looking at these girls without disdain.

Huh. Alright. Just this once. 

damnitdamnitdamnitdamnit

The effing worst part is that I KNOW this wasn't him, obviously. I don't even think he knows what PostSecret even is. But DAMNIT. I feel so f*cking lonely and so ready to quit but I just CAN'T. I can't quit you.

"Most Impatient/Needy Person Ever" Award goes to...

Mumford & Sons

Blame Me!

Torturing ourselves, we must be into the abuse. If you're the rope that ties us together, then please make me a noose. Ask me to leave, then beg me just to stay. Used to run to my arms, but now I walk away. Come and go as you please. I'm like a part-time lover with well-worn knees.

Conflict

Want. To. Sleep. But. Must. Stay. On. While. Internet. Is. Working.

Also, I really really really want to talk to you. But let's be real, you're not going to respond. Grr.

The Pretty Sky, Not Bad, Not Bad At All

Movement

There they are. There they go. They're moving on. They're going somewhere with their lives. They're doing something new. And here I stay. Waiting. Waiting for you. Watching them all go. Because I'm here, waiting for you.

And I can't even tell if you appreciate it

Soft Skeletons

Trapped Inside A Pretty Little Lie

Worst Birthday Ever

To top it all off? You didn't even say Happy Birthday

December 4th

R.I.P Rosa Miriam Bosquez, and happy birthday. To the most amazing woman in my life.

It's been years but I still miss you so much. I'd give up anything just to celebrate with you again.


Please excuse me world, I'll do my best not to cry like a complete disaster all day. I know I have other things to do.

Dance With A Devil On Your Back

Anime Boys & Blue Roses

Anime: Always doing it right

Yum

#ishIrasays 7

"She gives up all her money to feed the poor hungry people for a week, and that's nice. That's good, but what are they next week? Poor and hungry." In a whiny voice, "The children keep dying. They keep dying!"

-le sigh-

Irrelevant People

"ur only alive because its illegal to kill yhu. ..'

 

...So is weed but every other status you post is about that.

God, there is no logic behind you. You're just a pure dumbass. 

Boys In Polos

#Yum

God, Drugs, & Sex

A grand blank look on your face
When you learned it was over
Do you ever question why?
What could have been different?
We were so comfortable
Living in each others skin
I was dying from within

'Cause God, drugs, and sex don't mean a thing
To you now, do they now baby?
I don't mean anything
By it now, do I now sweetheart?
You should have thought about then for now
God drugs and sex don't mean a thing
To you now, do they now baby?
You should have thought about then for now
But I've gotta leave
I've gotta leave

Tell me where did you learn to love?
(Maybe you don't want to know)
Tell me when did your hands grow cold?
(It might tell you something)
If you could go back to yesterday
Would you change it all for me?
If you thought we could be together,
Would you believe that

'Cause God, drugs, and sex don't mean a thing
To you now, do they now baby?
I don't mean anything
By it now, do I now sweetheart?
You should have thought about then for now
God, drugs and sex don't mean a thing
To you now, do they now baby?
You should have thought about then for now
But I've gotta leave
I've gotta leave

Did you not hear me coming around alone?
Did you not see me coming along the way?
Where the bright lights are leading you astray
Where the bright lights to grant you a way from your love
Don't leave anything
Would you change it all for me?

Let go, let go of me now
I'm not here
Let go, let go of me now
'Cause I'm already gone

Comparison

The one thing worse than wanting to run into someone's arms,

Not knowing whose arms to run to.

Abstinence

I haven't made my decision about you. But I've made my decision about me.

No Sex!

Male Priorities

Apparently fat girls > short girls

Sorry, that's incredibly rude and insensitive, I know. I'm awful. But why is your love life more exciting than mine?!

An Ira Thanksgiving

Email from Ira:
"I for got to remind you on Monday to have a spectacular Thanksgiving. After you
have finished your turkey and enjoyed the football folk drama, consider working
on making your 10 min. play's poster as fabulous as the big Apple's parade.
It's due on Mon. You can "wow" the class then."

No Ira. No.

Mexico

Lauren: That's the headband Nancy got you from Mexico
Jess: -sniff- It doesn't smell like Mexico

No More German

Me: (Commenting on girly habits) Ew, I'm a girl!
Jess: I know! I had the same realization the other day! I was like lol vagina!

How you know it's too late. Finish your homework Jess.

#TeamEvan

Because all Evan's have something really good about them.

I guess all Jonathan's must have something crappy about them. -sigh- Except they're all still really wonderful.

My Light

I know what I want. I f*cking know what I want. I know who I am. I know which path is the right one for me. I know where I'm going. You are not a part of ANY of that. As much as I want you to be, you're not. You're just not. Everything in this world is telling me to get the hell away from you so I can get back to me, because you're no good. So prove me wrong! PROVE ME F*CKING WRONG. And don't act stupid you know you're doing this. You have to. You OF ALL PEOPLE KNOW how f*cking NEEDY I am. You know how much I need to hear the words "I love you" and "I want to be with you". Not just "I want to f*ck you", and hey, I haven't even heard that in a good while. TALK. TO ME. ABOUT SOMETHING BESIDES YOUR DAMN MUSIC. You don't have to love me, no one said you did. But don't sit there and get my hopes up and make me f*cking wait for something that will never come. Just say you don't want this and that's fine. I've been dumped by you before, I can go through it again, and I'll survive. But don't f*cking make me wait! I've always waited for you. I've been waiting for you since we met. If I have to wait, remind me why I'm waiting instead of proving to me that it's a lost cause. It's not hard to write a message on facebook, have a conversation for 20 minutes. EVERYONE but you talks to me now. I just can't understand it.

Your music isn't stupid. I love it. And obviously it's your focus. You have work, you have deadlines. And we talked about this. We said it would be a while. I knew it wouldn't be easy. I knew I'd have to wait. You have so much going on. I could never demand anything more from you! It's not my place, it really isn't. I want you to do whatever you feel you have to to feel better. I really just want your happiness. I'm whining. I always whine. Don't listen to me. I'm being selfish... I just feel like I should be this time. I don't think I'm too in the wrong. A message every now and again would be nice. I miss you. Don't you miss me? 

I wanna cry. I wanna scream. I wanna break things. I wanna tear things. I wanna... I don't really know.

Oh Emily

Grabs her chocolates

Emily - It's too hot. They're melting.
Me - Put them in the fridge.
Emily - No
Me - Why not?!
Emily - They can melt in my tummy.

...

Light

Watch THIS.

Then look through THIS.

#ishIrasays 6

Describing the life of an opera singer.

Stage manager pushes Singer onto the stage.
Singer - What am I singing?
Stage manager - La Dona E Mobile
Singer - Oh okay, I love that song.
Curtain up, conductor starts
Singer - La Dona E Mobile! I'll sing real loud today! You want to come and pay! While I will sing a song.

Oh Stormy.

Test of Survival

Everyday is a reminder that I won't make it in this business. And if I do, I won't be able to live off just this.

Food for Thought

Morning Conversations

"You lost me at 'the'"

Club of Adventure

I Believe In Charlie McDonnell

Life According to Peanuts

Diet Week

I hate diet week.

Preferences

I'll take Kyou Sohma over Christian Grey any day.

Hint. Hint.

Kindly STFU

I will never understand twisted feminist logic. "You should be okay with women showing off their bodies, it's not a big deal, we can do what we want!" - "Oh my gosh stop staring at me, it's objectifying and rude, and scary!".

No.... No.

With the Sound of A Gat

#ishIrasays 5

"What's that one guy, the one you wouldn't know. He sings that song, it goes OOOOOOOH. But not the black guy, the white one."

(Don't worry, be happy)

#ishIrasays 4

In response to Mariah giving Ira a pumpkin muffin:

"I'm waiting for it to grow into something better. Maybe it'll be a cherry pie"

No Ira. No.

#ishIrasays 3

- Whistle from Mariah's phone-

"Wait, was that your machine? Oh, and I was about to come get my cookie. -pants like a dog-"

Ira... 3 times in like 10 minutes

#ishIrasays 2

"Bye Steve! I always feel bad about missing meetings with you -sob-... okay I'm over it"

...

#ishIrasays 1

"That black guy from the civil rights movement..."

...Martin Luther King?

Treasure/Torture

What Not to Click On When Hungry

Google Search: Breeze Curtain

raisethelastanchor.tumblr.com

:)

No More Political Ads Eve

Politics are boring.
I'm seventeen.
I DON'T CARE THAT YOU VOTED.

I HATE GOODBYES

ewkhyirwjgkdhgrwghhkjwrh ALL THE RED VS BLUE FEELS!

Sammy: ajfhdsghaghhtrwadfgfdggh
Emily: Aww sweetie.
Sammy: What do I do with my life?!?!
Emily: Go have chocolate?

Correct.

-Eating chocolate. Realize what just happened-

Sammy: OMG. THAT WASN'T JUST THE SEASON FINALE. THAT WAS THE SERIES FINALE! AKJGHJKDHGHDSHKJA
Emily: Don't you have ice cream in the freezer?

<3 INFINITE ROOMIE LOVE!

Now For Fun

1. Do you usually sleep with your closet door open or closed?

Closed. TF? Who sleeps with it open?

2. Do you take the shampoos and conditioner bottles from hotels?

Rarely

3. Have you ever ‘done it’ in a hotel room?

No, nor anywhere else.

4. Where is your next vacation?

Who even knows?!

5. Have you ever stolen a street sign before?

Nope.

6. Who do you think reads these?

Curious/Bored people. The minority.

7. Do you have a calendar in your room?

Yup

8. Where are you?

My dorm at McDaniel College in Westminster, MD.

9. What’s your plan for the day?

What day? It’s 11:12.

10. Are you reading any books right now?

Nah.

11. Do you ever count your steps when you walk?

Sometimes. Not as much as I did as a kid.

12. Have you ever peed in the woods?

Hasn’t everyone?

13. Do you ever dance even if there’s no music playing?

All the time.

14. Do you chew your pens and pencils?

Yup.

15. What is your “Song of the Week”?

Oh geez. I guess everything from Vital.

16. Is it okay for guys to wear pink?

Oh yes.

17. Do you still watch cartoons?

Religiously.

18. Whats your favorite love movie?

…I dunno. Howl’s Moving Castle is my favorite movie, and it has romance so let’s just say that.

19. What do you drink with dinner?

Water

20. What do you dip Chicken Nuggets in?

My mouth…

21. What is your favorite food/cuisine?

Italian

22. What movies could you watch over and over and still love?

Howl’s Moving Castle, West Side Story, Little Women, Interstella 5555, Newsies, Little Manhattan, ANYTHING Disney (especially The Hunchback of Notre Dame), anything Peanuts.

23. Last person you hugged/kissed?

Emily.

24. Were you ever a boy/girl scout?

Nope

25. Would you ever strip or pose nude in a magazine?

No. Just no.

26. When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper?

A few weeks ago actually.

27. Can you change the oil on a car?

HAH. No.

28. Ever gotten a speeding ticket?

I can’t drive.

29. Run out of gas?

… Can’t. Drive.

30. Favorite kind of sandwich?

Turkey!

31. Best thing to eat for breakfast?

French toast.

32. What is your usual bedtime?

LOUL

33. Are you lazy?

Depends

34. When you were a kid, what did you dress up as for Halloween?

I didn’t, I wasn’t allowed to. NOW I dress up.

35. Do you have any magazine subscriptions?

No sir

36. Which are better, legos or lincoln logs?

LEGOS. But we love Lincoln Logs <3

37. Are you stubborn?

Oh yeah.

38. Who is better…Leno or Letterman?

Letterman.

39. Ever watch soap operas?

Only with la madre, and in Spanish. Uysh.

40. Afraid of heights?

Duh.

41. Sing in the car?

And everywhere else.

42. Dance in the shower?

Like nobody’s business.

43. Dance in the car?

Like a music video.

44. Ever used a gun?

Duck Hunt, nuff said.

45. Do you think musicals are cheesy?

Yes, and it’s WONDERFUL.

46. Is Christmas stressful?

Not in the slightest.

47. Ever eat a pierogi?

Can’t say I have.

48. Major annoyance right now?

People erasing my board.

49. Occupations you wanted to be when you were a kid?

Teacher. Singer. Interior Designer.

50. Do you believe in ghosts?

I don’t think so?

51. Ever have a deja-vu feeling?

Duh.

52. Do you take a vitamin daily?

No sir.

53. Wear slippers?

Yepp

54. Wear a bath robe?

Only at home (not college)

55. What do you wear to bed?

Pajamas.

56. Wal-Mart, Target or K-Mart?

TARGET!

57. Nike or Adidas?

Sweat shops = no no

58. Cheetos Or Fritos?

Cheetos.

59. Peanuts or Sunflower seeds?

Pshh, natural food. LOUL.

60. Ever hear of, “gorp”?

Yes actually.

61. Ever taken karate?

No.

62. Ever kissed someone of the same sex?

Niet.

63. Can you curl your tongue?

Not in the cool ways.

64. Ever won a spelling bee?

Never entered one.

65. Ever cried because you were so happy?

All the time!

66. Own any record albums?

Teehee yes yes

67. Own a record player?

Sigh. Nope.

68. Regularly burn incense?

Nah

69. Ever been in love?

I don’t think so. I think I’m close though.

70. Hot tea or cold tea:

Hot?

71. Tea or coffee?

Neither. But I guess tea.

72. Favorite kind of cookie?

Thin Mints!

73. Can you swim well?

Can’t swim at all.

74. Can you hold your breath w/o manually holding your nose?

Rarely

75. Are you patient?

NOT AT ALL.

76. Ever won a contest?

Don’t think so.

77. Ever had plastic surgery?

No!

78. Which are better black or green olives?

Neither.

79. Can you knit or crochet?

Nope

80. Wash room or bathroom?

Bathroom.

81. Do you want to get married?

Not to you! JK. I’d like to be married someday.

82. Who was your High School crush?

… why do you act like there was only one? I’m a girl, my interests change over time, thanks.

83. Do you cry and throw a fit until you get your own way?

No, I’m not actually 5 even if I act like it, thanks.

84. Do you have kids?

Nope.

85. Do you want kids?

Not right now, but after marriage yes.

86. What kind of mom are you?

The potential future kind? I guess?

87. Do you miss anyone right now?

OH YEAH.

88. Who do you want to see right now?

Jonathan ‘cause eff my life.