Don't Read! Religion. Ew.

That was so moving. I seriously felt the need to sob in that church. How is it that God always knows exactly what to say? I don't even know if I can put my thoughts and feelings into words, but I feel that I have to. I have been so awful this year. Seriously, I have distanced myself from God so immensely, it pains me. I am fully aware of how horrible I've been, and I've been stalling on asking for forgiveness. I've been scared. I've been doubtful. I've been ignorant. I've been neglectful. I've been absolutely awful! But He loves me. Oh man, does He love me. And He has done the ultimate to prove it. I don't think I've ever really grasped it until now, but OH MY GOODNESS. He truly does love me! He has given so much, He has given EVERYTHING for me. No matter how undeserving I am, and how ungrateful I can be. He loves me. I need to stop. I need to stop and rethink this year. My life. I can't keep doing this. I need to find Him again. Find Him and, for once in my life, show Him just a portion of the love that He so deserves. Show Him that bit of faith that I need for Heaven. Because He is so good. And I need to strive to be more like him. This holiday is called Christmas for a reason. Remember, this is a celebration. He is here. He has come. Our Savior, loving and forgiving, has come. I can't even fathom it. There's so much I want to say. And so much I want my peers and loved ones to know. I hope someone finds this. I truly do. I want them to hold me to this. To constantly bring me back to this post and remind me of it. Remind me that I promise to be better. That I said "I want to walk in the right path, with Christ as my guide and the scriptures as my map". Merry Christmas