Home for the Holidays

I'm having this realization that people aren't that close to their extended families. Which should be an obvious thing, but it's not.

Most people travel for the holidays. They've got family in different states, so they all pick a house and a giant meal is prepared and they're reunited for one of the few times they see each other all year. They spend a full weekend there. And when they don't travel, they are free to do as they wish for the holidays. As long as some time is spent with immediate family, it's not a big deal. So either teens go out with friends, or the four people in the house go to church together, or whatever.

My family is all within a half hour of each other. They always have been. We grew up together and have been each other's best friends our entire lives. There's never a lot of catching up to do because we already know what's going on. Sometimes people travel or move temporarily. But in all honesty, it's been so lovely having everyone there. My cousins and my aunts aren't just people I see around the holiday season and avoid at parties. They are ALWAYS. THERE. I know them intimately. As a result, we are blessed enough to spend every single holiday together. I can't imagine having grown up apart from them. I can't imagine celebrating anything without them.

Which is why, as I get older, it grows increasingly strange for me to see how different it is for others. I won't say I took my situation for granted because I've always been grateful for it. But it shocks me, even though it shouldn't, that this isn't how everyone lives. I hear about people's closest relatives (outside of immediate family) and most of the memories are reserved for special occasions. They didn't get together after school, they didn't have mutual friends, they didn't have sleepovers on random weekends. It felt so odd and disconnected. They only heard about each other through phone calls and stories from parents. Additionally, they spend New Year's out partying with friends from school or work, or they'll go to church and ring in the New Year with their congregation. I genuinely cannot imagine ever celebrating something so important without my family right by my side. And I'm realizing that a lot of that is because most people don't have that option. It's a blessing to have family so close. It's pretty common practice to not have that, evidently.

So I'm a little torn. Because I love my church, and I love my friends, and it would be so wonderful to enjoy holidays with them. Friendsgiving seems like a beautiful idea! And I agree with my Pastor and his wife, starting the new year right means putting God first, so spending New Years there sounds like a lovely idea. It just genuinely hurts me to think that my entire extended family wouldn't be there. That we could celebrate ANYTHING without all the delicious food and a game playing on TV and pictures in front of that same seagull painting. Eventually, I'll have to choose where I go. Eventually, I may have kids who don't get to live so close to their cousins, and I'll have to work extra hard to help them create and maintain those bonds. I've been so spoiled with this blessing that the thought of living just like everyone else does actually terrifies me and breaks my heart.